Ahhh well, this is a first...

A first post that is. Wow Atlanta is FRICKIN HUGE! The guys at Saturn told me that my first assignment would be to go out and walk the streets of Atlanta for the rest of the week. They said before I could work here I needed to understand the look and feel of the culture here. I was shocked. They handed me a check bigger than I have ever seen and told me to go get an apartment and some new clothes. The check i held in my hands was for 1500 dollars! I was like HOLY SHITTAKE MUSHROOMS....So Katrina and I went shopping and she helped pick out some clothes for me. Mainly because I have NO taste what so ever. Saturn productions facility is way bigger than I thought it would be. I saw my office or should I say my "booth thing" today. It's really an office it's just got so much editing stuff in there i can't help but call it an editing booth. I looked in the mirror today and saw a smile on my face....and then it faded really quickly. Mainly because I picked up the phone and then realized, I can't call her anymore...She can't share this with me...She...isnt here for me anymore. It was then that I got really depressed. I really don't think this is going to work. I think that she is going to find someone a million times better. In fact I know she is. I just think that the whole marriage promise is her way of leting me down easily, when in fact it's just gonna make it worse. I told her that I didnt expect anything to come from this but in all honesty I do. I want everything back right now. I don't want to wait. I can't wait until the 23rd...she promised me. If she breaks that promise then...She probably will get pushed out of my world. As for her being worried about Katrina...I don't THINK there's any reason for her to be....but...where as Katrina is stable...she doesnt love me like Liz does....err...did.


- Burnt Ashes